i need an iv and a liver transplant
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize