well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
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We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
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That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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