What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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