I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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