i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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