Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
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Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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