I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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