you didnt know i had herpes?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize