The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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