She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
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But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
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k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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