He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize