Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize