I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
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230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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