Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Randomize