first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize