I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you mean i was at the winter classic?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize