So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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