I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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