Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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