I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize