She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize