a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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