dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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