Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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