Kareoke will never be a sober sport
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize