Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
It's blow job season.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize