i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize