This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
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I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
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It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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