every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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