margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
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I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
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I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
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