it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
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My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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