turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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