I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
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No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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