Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
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There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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