sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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