The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
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When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
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She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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