There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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