please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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