so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize