Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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