dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
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Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
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I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
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