he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
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He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
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I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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