I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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