if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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