8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
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And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
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