All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize