he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I'm passing your future prison.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize