Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
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just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
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Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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