Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
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It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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