I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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